Yesterday, my brother read my post on failures. Having been with me through my time of distress he knew exactly what I was going through the day I wrote that post. What he then read on the blog was a brief description of my internal distress and the ways in which I would deal with it. He read what the two of us were discussing that day and what he realised was that he read what could essentially be described as a diary entry.
I don’t blame him for asking me if my blog is turning into an online diary because from that post and a couple of other posts from the last few days you could easily say that yes, some of them are a little touchy-feely-diary-entry like. I completely get it. The thing is though, when you’re expected to write for 30 days straight while still trying to attend to your daily obligations, you have no choice but to be honest because when you’re honest, the words spew out like a projectile vomit.
I don’t always have something to say, yet I want everything I say to have some sort of meaning behind it because I want my words to either inspire, challenge, reassure, motivate, or just put a smile on the face of whoever reads it. On the days where I’m not struck by a thought or idea and I have nothing I actually really want to write about I turn to my heart and listen to what it has to tell me. That translates into some sort of depth that may just be worth taking time out of your day to read. However, accessing your heart requires honesty. Actually, more accurately, honesty requires accessing the heart. Actually, honesty and accessing the heart are not independent of one another so to be the one you must do the other. But, doing that results in some diary entry type shit. That’s the result of such an endeavour and there’s nothing I can do about that.
So no, brother bear, this blog is not turning into an online diary. However, if I have no idea what to write about but I must write something, then you best believe I’m gonna write about how I’m feeling at that exact moment because I believe in being honest and raw. There’s beauty in it. Moreover, it’s the easiest thing to write about because you don’t have to search too hard for the words, they’re already there. I also think that writing “deep chats” from time to time helps others deal with their own personal issues and helps them live their best lives and honestly, that’s all I really want people to do. I do this in the hopes that my honesty can inspire others to be more honest too.
“Diary entry deep chats” will not end with the end of this blogging challenge. “Diary entry deep chats” will never end. They’re important. Honesty is important. However, there won’t be enough of them to ever call this blog an online diary. This is just a blog. And I’ll write about whatever I damn please. (And whatever anyone suggests I should write about.)
That is all.